Well during a rather dull evening in a school boarding house, rustic mongoose and his aquaintances began to ponder the notion of 'Spontaneous Human Combustion'.
Their searchs brought them to the notorious nether regions of wikipedia, a popular gathering site for those trying to find something to copy and paste for an essay due the next day and also the fountain source of all knowledge.
The
site read:
Spontaneous human combustion (SHC) is the alleged enormous burning of a person's body without a readily apparent, identifiable external source of ignition. The combustion may result in simple burns and blisters to the skin, smoking, or a complete incineration of the body. The latter is the form most often 'recognized' as SHC. There is much speculation and controversy over SHC. It is not a proven natural occurrence, but many theories have attempted to explain SHC's existence and how it may occur. The two most common explanations offered to account for apparent SHC are the non-spontaneous "wick effect" fire, and the rare discharge called "static flash fires". Although physically it can be shown that the human body contains enough energy stored in the form of fat and other tissues to consume itself completely, in normal circumstances bodies will not sustain a flame on their own.
In a simpleton's terms. A bloke explodes for no apparent reason! Awesome!
Those who have had the misfortune to suffer from such randomness are often tramps, blind drunk from their methalated spirits, which aids the possibility of combustion. Remember! Drinking Kills.
Such a rapscalion was Robert Francis Bailey, who lived his life in 1960s London. A quote from the diary of the first police officer on the scene follows:
When I got in through the window I found the body of a tramp named Bailey laying at the bottom of the stairs leading up to the second floor.[1] He was lying partly on his left side. There was a four-inch slit in his abdomen from which was issuing, at force, a blue flame. The flame was beginning to burn the wooden stairs. We extinguished the flames by playing a hose into the abdominal cavity. Bailey was alive when he started burning. He must have been in terrible pain. His teeth were sunk into the mahogany newel post of the staircase. I had to prise his jaws apart to release the body. The fire was coming from within the abdomen of his body.
And so concludes this forage into the world of spontaneous human combustion. I hope you enjoy it cause I have to wake up fucking early tomorrow and at this rate I'm screwed. O well...
*shout out to towli3 and sexy hitzel*